Wednesday, November 21, 2007

You know you're an Allentown gardener if ...


A bunch of Western New York bloggers are playing the neighborhood stereotype game, prompted by this article. Here's mine:

You Know You’re an Allentown Gardener if:

1. The only grass you have is on the patch between sidewalk and road and you’re in the process of replacing that with perennials or some kind of hardscaping.

2. You disdain overly flamboyant holiday decorations and tend to favor tasteful white candles and lighting that highlights the architecture of your house. Or you go the other way—all the way—and create a spectacle that becomes a tourist destination (no inflatables though).

3. Flamboyance is always encouraged in summer however, when cars screech to a halt so the occupants can stare at your bright orange and red cannas, daylilies, oriental lilies, and tropicals in your front yard.

4. Any use of gazing balls, pink flamingos, and smoking cowboy silhouettes is purely ironic and only brought out for parties, which, admittedly, are frequent.

5. Architectural remnants and strange stone objects from former Buffalo mansions are common throughout the neighborhood.

6. You have at least one outside bar, one upper, and one lower dining space, and a complex outside lighting and sound system. Fortunately, the local precinct has been ignoring noise complaints from Allentown for some years. Gunshots will alert them, so be advised.

7. Though your back yard is the size of a Civic, you have one and usually two ponds, both containing koi the size of small dogs.

8. Participation in Garden Walk is handed down from homeowner to homeowner. Hapless newcomers who think they can get away without entering Garden Walk are pressured until they give in, hiring a landscaping service if necessary to make sure their garden is up to snuff.

9. Though ponds are considered the main event, throwaway water features like fountains, birdbaths, and Zen-like bubbly thingies are common, though they do not qualify as water features on the Garden Walk application.

10. Every morning, neighbors greet each other and enjoy coffee while gingerly removing crack bags, syringes, and junk food wrappers from the front of their properties.

10 comments:

Gina said...

I wanna visit your neighborhood! It sounds awesome!

kate said...

Gee, the images in my head about Allentown are quite something! Koi the size of dogs ... it must be the water!

Garden Wise Guy said...

Elizabeth: Has anyone zapped you for a ‘meme’ lately? It’s a pleasant little exercise in proliferating blogs. Have a look at my blog (http://gardenwiseguy.blogspot.com) and decide if you’d like to keep things moving. Simple rules and a great way to see what everyone is up to…

While I have you here, would you be interested in an exchange of links?

EAL said...

You're linked, wise guy. As for the meme, I don't know ... maybe.

Layanee said...

Nice! I like globes though! Sorry but it is true! I think it is an age thing! LOL

lisa said...

Heh...you guys sound like a positive force to be reckoned with! No crackhead could stand a chance! ;-)

Anonymous said...

This is great. I am just learning about blogging. Want to start a blog for our sorority.

Anonymous said...

情趣用品,情趣用品,情趣用品,情趣用品,情趣用品,情趣用品,情趣用品,情趣用品,情趣,情趣,情趣,情趣,情趣,情趣,情趣,情趣,按摩棒,跳蛋,充氣娃娃,情境坊歡愉用品,情趣用品,情人節禮物,情惑用品性易購,A片,視訊聊天室

免費A片,AV女優,美女視訊,情色交友,免費AV,色情網站,辣妹視訊,美女交友,色情影片,成人影片,成人網站,A片,H漫,18成人,成人圖片,成人漫畫,情色網,日本A片,免費A片下載,性愛

A片,色情,成人,做愛,情色文學,A片下載,色情遊戲,色情影片,色情聊天室,情色電影,免費視訊,免費視訊聊天,免費視訊聊天室,一葉情貼圖片區,情色,情色視訊,免費成人影片,視訊交友,視訊聊天,視訊聊天室,言情小說,愛情小說,AIO,AV片,A漫,av dvd,聊天室,自拍,情色論壇,視訊美女,AV成人網,色情A片,SEX

情趣用品,A片,免費A片,AV女優,美女視訊,情色交友,色情網站,免費AV,辣妹視訊,美女交友,色情影片,成人網站,H漫,18成人,成人圖片,成人漫畫,成人影片,情色網


情趣用品,A片,免費A片,日本A片,A片下載,線上A片,成人電影,嘟嘟成人網,成人,成人貼圖,成人交友,成人圖片,18成人,成人小說,成人圖片區,微風成人區,成人文章,成人影城,情色,情色貼圖,色情聊天室,情色視訊,情色文學,色情小說,情色小說,臺灣情色網,色情,情色電影,色情遊戲,嘟嘟情人色網,麗的色遊戲,情色論壇,色情網站,一葉情貼圖片區,做愛,性愛,美女視訊,辣妹視訊,視訊聊天室,視訊交友網,免費視訊聊天,美女交友,做愛影片

av,情趣用品,a片,成人電影,微風成人,嘟嘟成人網,成人,成人貼圖,成人交友,成人圖片,18成人,成人小說,成人圖片區,成人文章,成人影城,愛情公寓,情色,情色貼圖,色情聊天室,情色視訊,情色文學,色情小說,情色小說,色情,寄情築園小遊戲,情色電影,aio,av女優,AV,免費A片,日本a片,美女視訊,辣妹視訊,聊天室,美女交友,成人光碟

情趣用品.A片,情色,情色貼圖,色情聊天室,情色視訊,情色文學,色情小說,情色小說,色情,寄情築園小遊戲,情色電影,色情遊戲,色情網站,聊天室,ut聊天室,豆豆聊天室,美女視訊,辣妹視訊,視訊聊天室,視訊交友網,免費視訊聊天,免費A片,日本a片,a片下載,線上a片,av女優,av,成人電影,成人,成人貼圖,成人交友,成人圖片,18成人,成人小說,成人圖片區,成人文章,成人影城,成人網站,自拍,尋夢園聊天室

sex999 said...

A片,A片,情色,情色,A片,A片,情色,情色,A片,A片,A片下載,做愛,成人電影,.18成人,日本A片,情色小說,情色電影,成人影城,自拍,情色論壇,成人論壇,情色貼圖,情色,免費A片,成人,成人網站,成人圖片,AV女優,成人光碟,色情,色情影片,免費A片下載,SEX,AV,色情網站,本土自拍,性愛,成人影片,情色文學,成人文章,成人圖片區,成人貼圖

美女交友,AIO交友愛情館,AIO,成人交友,視訊交友網,視訊交友,拓網交友,PC交友,視訊交友90739,交友,情色交友,聊天室交友,辣妹視訊,視訊辣妹,美女視訊,視訊美女,情色視訊,日本AV,免費視訊聊天,視訊聊天,AV女優,AV,視訊聊天室,視訊,免費視訊,情人視訊網,本土自拍,自拍,AVDVD,SEX,微風成人,微風論壇,微風成人區,成人網站,成人,成人電影,嘟嘟成人網,成人貼圖,成人影片,成人圖片區,成人圖片,18成人,成人小說,成人影城,成人文章,成人論壇,愛情公寓,情色論壇,情色,色情聊天室,色情,情色貼圖,情色文學,色情小說,情色小說,寄情築園小遊戲,色情遊戲,情色電影,情色網,做愛,UT聊天室,聊天室,聊天,哈拉聊天室,豆豆聊天室,尋夢園聊天室,聊天室尋夢園,080苗栗人聊天室,苗栗人聊天室,080中部人聊天室,080聊天室,中部人聊天室,柔情聊天網,6K聊天室,小高聊天室,上班族聊天室,免費A片,A片,成人聊天室,一夜情聊天室,情色聊天室,色色網,免費AV

martin said...

lol...great read!